NEW YEAR, NE— literally same me. —Blog - Acts Two Fellowship — Christian Fellowship at UC Berkeley | Christian Fellowship on the UC Berkeley Campus | Student Club Group at Berkeley | Acts Two Fellowship — Christian Fellowship at UC Berkeley (a2f)

Why am I still surprised every year, without fail, that I don’t transform into a “better me” when the clock strikes twelve? I just think it’s a bit unfair to create this awful annual expectation for society when it’s obviously not working — specifically, for me.

I’ve had these terrible thoughts for a while now, but this past winter break it got spiced up with A2F’s Winter Challenges. This winter, we wanted to commit to keeping ourselves productive and spiritually disciplined in a variety of ways: Reading apologetics books, doing chores around the house, being consistent in prayer and devotion, exercising regularly, etc. I know. How exciting.

But I thought to myself, “last winter break, all I did was read ‘Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me?’ by Mindy Kaling.” I foresaw a similar impending doom this year, so I came to the shocking conclusion that I should probably take up some of those spiritual challenges.

The two goals I enjoyed the most were the “no social media for a day” and daily prayer and devotion. I remember before I went home telling one of my life group leaders that I could definitely do a full month social media cleanse and he laughed at me and said: “You have to be realistic Cameron!” You know what, he was absolutely right. I still attempted longer periods of no social media though and I’ll have you know my social media use was extensively reduced.

I primarily use Facebook to . . . honestly, I don’t know. I guess I use it to look at memes and chuckle or something, which I guess can be a timewaster. I use Youtube to watch mostly film-related videos like Actors on Actors, The Hollywood Roundtable, and interviews with filmmakers. Mildly educational, but perhaps a bit too much excess distraction. To me, what was crazy about doing this cleanse was I could finally see how social media affects me.

Social media is a perpetual gap-closer. While waiting for a table at a restaurant with my family, my hand instinctively went to my pocket before I even thought “Facebook.” This happened so many times that I deleted all the apps that I would frequently use and even then, I still would open my phone looking for something to clutch my mind onto, but not finding anything except things like the Safeway app. Even at night, it was a struggle; I’m pretty sure before sleeping, I average about an hour of watching Youtube videos. It took a while, but over time, I slowly transformed the intuitive habit of grabbing my phone to talking to the person in front of me instead.

**Me and my relatives during a snowy week**

My parents and my older brother aren’t particularly talkative personalities, so I got to engage them in deeper and lighthearted conversations that let us bond as a family over the many dinners. Indeed, the social media cleanse became so helpful in the short opportunities I had to connect with family that my parents started to tell me that I talk too much. Even when hanging out with high school friends every so often, there would be a weirdly random couple of minutes where everyone was just on their phones, but I would try to ask them questions. When I visited my cousins, one night, instead of watching Youtube I talked to my cousin late into the night and he shared with me the different struggles he had with his relationship with God. All these experiences throughout break opened my eyes to how engaging in less social media can free your mind for things that truly matter, such as the relationships God has given you in your life.

This goal was complemented with the time set aside for daily prayer and devotion. It’s ironic, but even though I’m an English major and I love reading and writing, it is such a struggle for me to journal and reflect. Sometimes my journaling goes kind of like: “this happened, then that, I feel bad, oh well, let’s move on, bye.” Usually while trying to learn from God’s word, I would keep thinking about all the things I needed to do that day. However, doing this with less social media in my life, my mind was a bit less cluttered and had more capacity for clearer thinking even if I had to just sit there for a second to make myself concentrate. My praying wasn’t rushed anymore, but more thoughtful and honest. I spent more time praying for other people in my life and I think that’s one of the best spiritual practices because praying for yourself all the time is actually so boring (not to say that you shouldn’t).

I could see how disciplining myself through these little ways to pay more attention and connect to God that my days were calmer because my attitude and perspective were slowly softened by God’s word in the morning and peaceful prayers in the night. It’s often difficult to take the time to pause and process what’s going on, but it is so worth it for the inch of progress that you receive.

Turns out, it takes actual discipline and diligence to create a new you, a new me. One who has grown closer to God as a result.